Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
Randomize
