We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
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