Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
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