He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
Randomize
