Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
