There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
What were you even doing out there at 2 a.m.?
Look, i had a gallon of lemonade, a pack of smokes and a Darth Vader voice changer. What did you EXPECT me to do?
Randomize