dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
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