This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Randomize
