I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
Randomize
