If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
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