Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
My most recent midlife crisis involved eating a doughnut in 30 seconds but taking 5 minutes to do half a shot of whiskey, then deciding I wasn't going to finish it.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
