You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
Randomize
