I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
I want to make a zoo with you.
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
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