My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
my poor anus
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
Randomize
