so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
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