in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
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