Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
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