Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
Randomize
