idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
The idiot babysitter thought my dildo was a teething toy and gave it to our child.
Did you put it in the freezer again?
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
