How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
why did i wake up with a kid named Raphael in my bed this morning?
I dont know but you did call last night to tell me you found the last ninja turtle
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
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