even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
Randomize
