Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
