I bet he comes in French.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
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