Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
I won't apologize to a one balled man
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
