she was so not down for the gang bang
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Randomize
