Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
Randomize
