Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
He shit in the fireplace
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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