he wants to bone in the snuggie
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Randomize
