Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
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