her vagine was all disorganized.
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Randomize
