I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
I woke up under a house in Key West
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
Randomize
