At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
FUCK WHALES
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