i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
I love you. Go after that dick
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
Randomize
