it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
That's when you crack a 10am beer
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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