i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
we have pet lesbian snakes
I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
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