if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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