Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
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