We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
