it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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