just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
