I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
Drunk tip #47: Its better to overestimate how many plastic bottles itll take to urinate in, rather then underestimate.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
Randomize
