i jhust puked up my retainher.
did you hook up austin?
No! he threw up in my bathroom, made me wake up and order him jimmy johns, beat my roommate with a macaroni and cheese box, and then passed out with her in her bed
The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
I just broke up with Liz. I feel awful so I put two free rentals on her Blockbuster account.
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
Randomize
