Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
i wish my penis had a tongue
I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Randomize
