i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize
