Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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