i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
