I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
Randomize
