so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
I love you.
Bad choice
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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