look no pants
I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
Randomize
