oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
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